not to be dramatic but this was the worst year of my life :)
quick disclaimer: mental health is super important but with this post i'm not trying to diminish or "minimize" the lifes covid 19 has taken. this is a serious matter. also please talk to someone if you are struggling, you can e-mail me if you want someone to talk to.
so...
when i first heard about the news of the virus spreading i was at a birthday party watching random people make out, talking to my group of friends and enjoying a drink or two. to be honest we were quite happy to miss school and some classes and we thought it wasn't going to last. fast forward to staying at home for months, the hell of virtual classes, missing birthdays and parties and, mostly, missing people.
my days were getting boring and dull, yes i'm aware that they're the same thing. it started to feel as though i was no longer part of my body or part of my life. it was like i was watching a movie about myself and couldn't change the channels or, for that matter, at least turn up the volume. then the numbness came, ugh, it was awful. i couldn't feel happy or sad, things that once made me happy made me feel nothing and things that made me sad now made me angry. i was tired after sleeping for hours, couldn't figure out how to feel or how to communicate, had projects but nothing to look forward to, and so on. old problems resurfaced and my self esteem dropped dramatically.
so i spent a few shitty months. but i got better. i am better.
how? here is my manifesto on how i got back on track. (what worked for ME).
1- crying. never felt better after crying. if you need to cry for a few days, it's ok. hug your pet or a pillow and let yourself pour your heart out.
2- constantly reminding myself that all feelings are temporary. you will feel better i promise. nobody can't stay sad for too long. there's a saying in spanish that says: no hay mal que dure cien años ni cuerpo que lo aguante. translate it yourself :)
3- leaving my house. i know this is the hardest. take baby steps; maybe walk your dog or go do the groceries. gradually expose yourself to the unknown. maybe you can go for a hike another day or visit a coffee shop outside your neighbourhood.
4- move your body. at least a little bit. do yoga, do harcore workouts, dance, run, swim i don't care just move your body. and try to eat healthy, if you hate healthy stuff at least replace one of your meals for something more "organic" (hate that word).
5- controversial tip: remember what you used to do when you were happier. this can be difficult since maybe you simply can't go back to who you were when you were happier because, well, people (and life) change. but. remember what made you happy then and try to bring back some of that into your new lifestyle. if you didn't understand this part, just practice gratitude. trust me.
alright really opened up with this one but im only doing this in case it helps somebody and also because i want to start making longer posts and practice english.
k bye.
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